Archive for the ‘Letting go’ Category

“If you ain’t makin mistakes, you ain’t trying!” – Wynton Marsalis

Mistakes can be daunting.  They are one of the ways that we have to face our humanness and our human-mess.

When your self-esteem is all wrapped up in not ever making mistakes or letting people find out you’ve messed up, it can be very fragile and unstable.  Living from this contracted, secretive place will suck the energy right out of you.  And then who’s going to have the energy to really take on the things that matter?

I love this quote by trumpeter Wynton Marsalis!  It goes right to the heart of things – are you willing to try?  Can you fall down and not lose your passion – your motivation – your determination?

Yesterday I cancelled a pretty expensive subscription to an email marketing site.  I had signed up in the heat of a conference, in the throes of ‘I can do anything and this will help me!’  Unfortunately, after a month of trying to get the functions going, I was depleted and frustrated.  I won’t say the product didn’t work, but I had made a mistake in getting it without enough careful consideration of my situation and how ready I was.

What I’m really proud of is this: instead of pulling out a baseball bat and crying over the money I’d spent, I decided to really stand tall in my entrepreneur shoes, cop to the fact that things weren’t working for me and let go.  No heavy punching about ‘why aren’t I big enough yet?’  And no ‘Wow, that was a really dumb decision!’

Entrepreneurs make lots of mistakes when they’re stretching to grow.  It’s just part of the path.  If you want to walk this path, it’s good to bring along a big dose of loving kindness for yourself.  Stuff like, “It’s cool that you were willing to try this bigger product, and someday soon, you will be ready.”  And “Good job noticing what was going on, what you were feeling and taking action to correct things quickly.”

When you’re the Boss of You, it helps a lot to be a really great one.  You do your own reviews.  You give yourself a wink and a smile when you see yourself being fluid and flexible.  It doesn’t have to be a big deal, but instead of shrinking at the idea of a mistake, you pay attention, learn something, and move forward towards the bigger goal.

What about you?  How are you handling mistakes?  What stories are you telling yourself?  Do you feel the loving kindness that gives permission to be human?  How we do anything is how we do everything. I’d love to hear what’s happening in your world – business or personal.  Are you trying?  What are you learning?  That’s what really interests me.

Victoria

Cracking Open, Letting Go, Revealing your Wild Soul


Aspens in their glory before falling and Letting Go

What is it to crack open?  In this season of the leaves dancing their brilliance and then letting go of the safety and security of the tree, I can see what it is – we fall.  We sever our connection to all that has held us – whether for a few days, a moment or many, many years.  Sometimes we float but more often it feels like a tearing separation.  Isn’t that why we held on for so long?  The fear of that tearing, that severing – oh what the mind can make up about the pain of that!

Watching the aspens give their best and brightest colors to the final weeks of autumn, I sense that this show of color is meant to remind me of the Wild Soul in each one.  As the trees will be bare for many months to come, “See me”, they say, “see my true self in all its glory! I am about to die a small death.  This is my cracking open – knowing that when I do, the visibility of my rainbow self will radically change how it appears.”

I was taught that you had to wear the rainbow for people to see it – bring your color to each day.  But now I know that this teaching was faulty.  I’m still learning to release it completely and fully embrace what I now know: Your most beautiful self isn’t about the outside image or presentation – it’s about your most vulnerable, human self.  The intimacy I seek comes when the egg cracks and spills its guts everywhere.  No more hiding (oh, the reclaimed energy from that!) and only letting the so-called ‘good’ stuff show.  Letting go of our masks.

Fall – Tear – Sever – Let Go.  And what you find is faith… and trust.  You find what your deeper beliefs really are about.  You said you believed there would be a net and now you find out.  The risk to find something greater than safely and security actually leads right to the door of your faith.  What do you find there?

While I know one can do this alone, I also know you don’t have to.  I offer the support of a soul sister, the compassion and rigor of a wise teacher; a guide.  So if you are clear enough to know, that 2 minds and 2 hearts paired can make any journey, and particularly the difficult one of learning to let go and trust, more possible, more meaningful and more rich, reach out to me.  I’m here, waiting for your call.

And if a weekend devoted to connecting with your Wild Soul is calling you, visit www.truelifecoach.net/wildsoul10.htm.  I’ve got 2 spots left – if you hear a call, now is the time to answer it!

In Wildness,

Coach Victoria

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